death ... and how friends keep you alive

For all intents and purposes, blogging has become a solace in some way or another. Having to just jot down your thoughts and feelings becomes some type of therapy.

thought shift ...

I just got a voice mail from my brother. My uncle Manoling just passed this morning, evening back in the Philippines. It shouldn't really come as a shock and yet it did. He's been battling colon cancer for over three years or so. The news was just not what I was expecting and yet right as I was about to check up my messages, half of me knew what the news would be. Debating for half a second if I should listen to his message or not, I decided to listen and hoping that it wouldn't be what I was afraid it would be. It's really the most inopportune time. I was about to go into a meeting. It took so much of me not to cry. A few tears were able to escape and was able to hold back the rest.

I eventually let go of some later on. Angela asked the right ... or wrong question (all depends on your perspective) and ultimately became the reason why the rest was let go but with some degree of control as well. Dave saw that I was upset. Asked if I was ok and I just said I was fine and not to push it. I'm glad that they took the hint and just proceeded to make me laugh all through lunch. I just just not in the mood for sympathies and the attention. I wanted it to be low key and keep doing what I'm doing. Dave suggested that I go home but going home would do no good. I would just end up sulking and that's the last thing I want to do. They were all kind enough to take me away from work and eat lunch at a Thai restaurant. Had some more good laughs and I hope they know how much I appreciate the laughter.

Later that day, I managed to talk to my cousin Carla and found out that she, Philip and her mom are ok. I got worried about her mom since she is suffering from the same type of cancer. She couldn't go home to the Philippines to visit and that just devastated her. Worse thing is, another aunt of mine was on her way there when Tito Manoling passed. She missed him by a mere hour and a half. What an awful news to behold as you land from several hours of plane ride.

That evening, my friend Chanelle brought over some flowers from her mom's garden, a card, and a container of cinnamon rolls. It was sweet of her.

I'm just glad that I have such wonderful people around me and made me appreciate them even more.