Could You be Messiah

I was in my car driving to work. For some reason, I found myself turning off the radio and just staring ahead. Then the song below just started playing in my head. I began singing and the next thing I know, I couldn't really sing it anymore with tears flowing down my face. I was caught off guard and it was quite early in the morning.

Maybe I just needed that time to be in silence. To listen to my heart and to what God is saying. I've been making myself busy for way too long and avoiding this time to think. I haven't had a chance to write down a song or a coherent thought that would reflect my inner most struggles or joys. In fact, I was avoiding it and I was running away trying to ignore the signs for self introspection.

I busied myself with the mundane. I delude myself of the possibility of a romantic relationship with a person, I know, deep down do not hold the same affection nor will he ever be "into me." I've been throwing myself into work. Maybe if I just throw myself back into the gym, I'll be better off.

Its not fair. I've been good. I've been as good as I could possibly be. I didn't fool around in the past nor will I start now. But my Faith wanes and I wonder, when will be the time where life is satisfying. When the puzzle pieces will fall in place. When will I fall in love.

Patience. Patience. Patience. Be till my heart and just hope and pray that the patience will payoff soon.

Could You Be Messiah

Could You be healer
To a heart that's been wounded
In a battle that's never seen
Could You be teacher
To a mind of confusion
Tell me what does this all mean
Are You deliverer
Of an imprisoned feeling in chains
Can You set my spirit free

And just one more question
Allow me this question
Could You be Messiah to me
Could You be Messiah to me

Could You be father
To a soul that's been abandoned
By a world to busy to hear
Could You be friend
To a helpless survivor
Can You take away my fears
I heard them all sharing
This new found conviction in them
Are You all that they make You to be
And just one more question
Allow me this question
Could You be Messiah to me
Please be Messiah to me

Now I've been looking for someone like You
And I'm so tired, I'm tired
I've read every book and I've sang every song
My mind maybe right but my heart feels so wrong
Tell me how much further can my life go along
Which way do the roads lead where do I belong...

Are You forgiver
Of my most unknown secrets
Provider of all that I need
Could You be brother
The one who knows better
Would You now stand in the lead
When all this is over all the thunder and lightning
In the daylight just what will I see
The answers to my questions to all of my questions
Could You be Messiah to me
Could You be Messiah to me
Could You be Messiah
Please be Messiah to me...

-Gary Valenciano